Dear eBay Queen: How to Avoid the eBay Buyer Drama

Dear eBay Queen:

I’m not sure what to do. I sold a super cute Lily Pulitzer dress that I wore one time to a wedding. It sold for 148.00 with free shipping. The dress was in perfect condition. The buyer left me positive feedback that was a little bit negative.

Pretty dress the pink isn’t as pink as it should be”

I messaged the buyer and asked them if they were happy, and this is what she said:

“The dress is lovely, but I just didn’t think it was the right shade of “lily” pink. I live in Miami Beach you know, and Lily is all the rage here. I did wear it to Mass and brunch on Sunday, and it got rave reviews. I took it into the Lily Pulitzer store, and they told me it was authentic. That is why you didn’t get the feedback I thought the dress deserved for not being as pink as I needed it to be.”

I responded with:

“I’m sorry the dress wasn’t as pink as you thought it should be. I would offer a refund, but since you’ve worn the dress and received compliments, I cannot offer that refund, once you’ve sent it back. Thank you again for letting me know there was a problem”.

She responds with:

“Is there a way to revise my feedback? I should have given you a negative for your smartness!”

Do you think I should just leave this alone? Should I offer her a partial refund? Is there a way for them to change this positive into a negative? Should I respond to the positive feedback?

Gigi S

Dear Gigi:

I would not respond to her feedback or to any of her other messages. I would block this buyer and try to forget about her. If you were to respond, then she could also put a response in, and who needs that kind of drama?


Dear eBay Queen:

This is quite possibly the strangest thing I’ve ever had happen to me on eBay. I sell vintage plush and toys. I have an extensive cataloging system that keeps track of my items with photographs, sizes, price I paid and sold the item for. I also do this with my vintage toys, but haven’t been doing it for as long with the toys.

I sold a large Animal Fair Henry the Dog 2 weeks ago. The buyer messages me and tells me it is not the correct size, and does not match up with my listing. I know that Animal Fair Henry only came in a couple of sizes, so I ask her what size is this Henry? She doesn’t respond.   A couple of days go by, and I am looking through my catalog and I see that I sold four years ago (yes it was really four years ago.) the same size Animal Fair Henry to this same buyer. I called eBay Seller support, and was on hold for 1 hour and 43 minutes without them ever answering. I went back into the return request, and asked the buyer if she could give me the measurements of the item that I sent. She responds to the case and says:

“It doesn’t matter, I want to return it!”

I respond to her this: “I see you are a seller also, and it does matter when someone says that you did not measure something correctly.   Animal Fair Henry only comes in a few sizes, and those are NOT close to being the same size as each other. If you want to return this simply because you do not want it, that is fine, but to say I did not measure it correctly will give me a defect. I did do some checking in my records and see that you purchased the same Animal Fair Henry plush from me 4 years ago. Did you make a mistake and not realize you purchased the same size plush? I don’t want you to be upset with me, but I know that I measured this correctly. Could you please measure this?”

She responds with: “You are an idiot. I don’t want it. Accept this return and take your defect like a man.”
I have not responded after this. Can you let me know what I should do with this problem? Should I just go ahead and accept the return and take the hit?



Dear Henry:

I would call eBay either early in the morning, or late afternoon. If the system tells you it’s a 10 minute wait, and you are on hold past 30minutes I would hang up and try again until you get through. This buyer is not being truthful I believe she wants to return it without paying for the shipping. I hope that eBay sees it the same way. I would make sure you tell eBay that they purchased the exact same item from you several years ago. If you have the date and the item number, I would make sure you can give it to them.


Strange eBay Item of the Week: Item #:262017888774. Lily Pulitzer items are incredibly popular right now. I found this dress that sold relatively high: Lily Pulitzer Dark and Stormy Shift Dress SOLD: $455.00.


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