I was having a conversation with my baby last night.  He just turned 5, and I like to talk to him about his dreams for when he’s older.  Here’s what his thoughts are on the subject of marriage.

Mom: What do you want to be when you grow up?

#5: I want to be a basketball player.  But I don’t think we have a basketball.

Mom: Do you want to get married?

#5: Nope.

Mom: Who’s going to make you dinner?

#5: Me.

Mom: What about children?  Are you going to have children?

#5:  No, I don’t want any children.  I’m going to have a dog.  He’s going to be black, white and green.  I will name him Max.

Mom: What kind of house are you going to live in?  Who’s going to clean it?

#5: I can clean it.  My house is going to be green and orange. I’m going to make sweet, juicy steak for dinner.  Can I bring my rock collection inside?  I don’t want it to get wet.

Mom: No, rock collections look better outside.

#5: I’m going to have my rock collection in MY house.

Mom: Are you sure you don’t want to get married?  Who will scratch your back?

#5: I can scratch my own back!  See? (he stood up and reached around and scratched his back).

Mom: Won’t you be lonely at your house?

#5: No, Max my dog  will be there.

Mom: Don’t you like kids?

#5: Yes.

Mom: Do you like women?

#5: I like women, I just don’t need one.

His father thinks this is the funniest thing he’s ever said..