Dear eBay Queen: Help! I’ve Been Blocked!


Dear eBay Queen:

I love to buy items from a certain seller.  I had a small problem with them a few weeks ago, and I just found out when I tried to buy some more items from them that they blocked me.  I don’t know what to do!  I’ve messaged them, and I have not heard back from them.  It’s only been a couple of hours, but I’m worried.

Here are the last two transactions I had with this seller.  I placed a rather large order for 4 different dresses in 4 different sizes.  I wanted to try each size on to see which one fit the best.  As it turns out the medium in one dress fit well and the Large in the other 3 fit well.  I opened a return request for the 12 items, and they accepted the return and I received my money back.

The second transaction was similar, but involved returns on some scarves and a jacket.  I purchase 4 scarves returned 2 and purchased 3 jackets and returned 2.  They accepted my return and I received the money back.

Never have I been rude or mean.  Do you think it’s because of the returns?  They offer free returns doesn’t that mean that it’s ok to return things?

When they message back, I will do anything so that I can buy from their unique eBay store.


Melanie R


Dear Melanie:

I think it probably has to do with the returns.

You purchased a total of 16 dresses.  You returned 12.  Purchased 4 scarves returned 2 and 3 jackets returned 2.  That’s a total of 16 Return requests opened for you.  When you opened that return request was your reason for return that they didn’t fit? or That you didn’t like the item?  OR was it because the items were not as described?

Since they have free returns, they had to pay return shipping on 16 items.  If the shipping was 5.65 per item that is 90.40 in return shipping fees they paid to have your items returned.

If you opened any of those returns for a reason other than “it didn’t fit” or “changed mind”  The seller received an invisible to you strike because your returns were due to the fault of the seller.  If you did that, not only did they pay almost 100.00 in return shipping, BUT they also could have their eBay metrics skewed by your returns.  When a seller receives high “faulty” returns they are charged more by eBay in their final value fees.

I don’t know how to make the seller accept sales from you.  I would be honest and let them know that you did not realize by opening that many requests could hurt their eBay account and bank account.  I might tell them if they let you buy again that you will not open return requests like that, you’ll go through them personally and send the items back in one box.


Dear eBay Queen: My buyer is Rude and Doesn’t Read the Descriptions!

Dear eBay Queen:

My husband  and I started a business selling broken items for parts.  We sell phones, TV’s and other electronics.  We have over 85,000 feedback, and I really feel like we’ve had everything happen to us, until this buyer.  We’ve had our fair share of buyers that say they didn’t read the description well, and didn’t know they were purchasing an item for parts.  A couple of weeks ago I woke up to this message:

“I just received confirmation that you sent the item! Are you dumb? I asked you not to send me that broken phone! Refund my order NOW!”

I respond and tell them I never received a message from them that they did not want their item.  They respond with this:

“Well, isn’t that fantastic? Just give me my money back, or I and all my friends will be buying more of your cheap broken crap and leaving you a negative for each item we buy. I’ve opened a not as described case against you.  I hope you choke on it.“

I immediately call eBay and they confirmed that this was feedback extortion, but I don’t think I should have to refund this guy’s money because of the way they are treating me.  eBay said that because I have a refund policy I should accept the refund.  I messaged the buyer and told them that I would be enforcing my return policy, and that when the item was returned I would refund their money less the restocking fee.  I received this back:

“I don’t care what your policy is.  You will give me my money back and I will be happy or you’ll be sorry.  This has not been a positive experience for me.  I think you deserve at least 5 negatives for this experience. I’ve looked at the crap you sell, and you sell some cheap items.  You need to respond to me quickly, because I will be acting on my urges to give you the negatives.   I’ve spoke to my partner about you, and she has set aside some money for us to purchase from you and then we will be hitting your feedback blitz!   Your feedback will be affected, I promise you that. “

I called eBay once again, and they told me not to respond.  The eBay rep told me to just wait for this buyer to send the item back. The buyer sent me another message.

“What now you are not going to message me? I look forward to teaching you a lesson.  I have sent you a money request through PayPal.  You need to send me my money back.   I’m not going to send you this broken phone until you do.  I don’t want to hear about how I need to send it back, or you restock fee.  I just want my money you con artist!  I believe in karma, and the secret.  My partner and I are sending you bad vibes.  We are believing that you will be receiving bad reviews.”

eBay has told me I just need to wait it out.  What do you think?




Dear Rene:

I’ve had a few buyers that have made similar promises, and just like eBay has told you wait for the buyer to make good on their threats.  Once they do that, eBay will take action.

Just in case, I would call eBay again and tell them this buyer opened a not as described case, and point out that the item IS as described, they just did not read the description.  Maybe, eBay might close the case for buyer’s remorse.  If that doesn’t happen, and they don’t send the item back within 30 days, contact eBay and they will close the case that the buyer opened in your favor.  Once that is done no feedback will be able to be left.  If you haven’t done so already make sure that you block the buyer.


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Dear eBay Queen: My American Girl Doll Buyer Is Not Very Nice What Should I Do?

Dear eBay Queen:

I had sent you an email one time and you really sold me on using Best Offer on my craft patterns.  I had an American Girl Doll set that I did not sell over the holidays, and I put it on Best Offer.  I had 350.00 on the set, and the buyer offered me $320.00.  When the offer came in, I was not home, so I checked her feedback on my phone before accepting it.  The buyer had 100% positive feedback, I always check feedback before I accept a best offer.  When I got to my house, I looked over the transaction only to see that I forgot to look at her “feedback left”, I only looked at the feedback received.  I am slightly freaked out to see that the buyer has left 12 negatives and 1 neutral out of the last 25 feedbacks she’s left!  A week has gone by, and she has not paid for the doll set.  I thought about opening a non paying bidder on her, but perhaps I should just cancel?  That’s what I would really like to do.   The buyer has not responded to the cancellation.  Do you think she’s going to object?  What do I do if she pays?

 I went through all seven pages of feedback she’s left other people, and I cannot believe that she continues to be allowed to buy on eBay!  She has left a TON of bad feedback for a variety of reasons; most were that the item was not received.  Most of the sellers responded with the delivery confirmation number, and when checked the item shows delivered.  eBay should be aware of this, & ban her, since she obviously is a scammer.

I know this is kind of stalkerish of me, but I looked this person up on Facebook, and Googled her address.  She lives in a FANTASTIC house, and based upon my deductions of her Facebook and her home, she doesn’t need to be stealing from eBay seller.  What can I do?


Dear Pat:

I think the best thing you can do is wait for your time for the cancellation to be up.  If she doesn’t respond in seven days, then go in and cancel.  If she pays, I would do several things to protect yourself:

  • Add signature confirmation  and insurance to the shipping
  • If you are worried about her saying something is not as described, I would video or photograph the stuff as you wrap it. 

I would also use the “report this member link” to let eBay to know about the way she handles herself on the site.  I hope that you come out of this with positive feedback and a happy customer.

Dear eBay Queen:

I’ve been enrolled in hassle free returns for about 2 months.  In early December, a buyer contacted me via email, then started the hassle free return process saying that the item did not fit quite right. It’s been almost 5 weeks, and the buyer has never shipped the item.  I figure the buyer decided to keep it. I messaged them at the beginning of January to see if they had sent it, and I did not get a message back. 

I received an email from eBay that asks if I received the shirt back.  I thought I could cancel the return, but the only resolution I saw was to give a refund, OR have eBay step in.  I clicked on “have eBay step in” and sent a message that pretty much says what I told you.

About 24 hours later, eBay sends me a message that states "We're issuing the buyer a refund for this case. You don't need to do anything else. This case won't be included when we evaluate seller performance. Note: It may take up to 24 hours to update in your Seller Dashboard.
Final decision:  You were not found at fault. Transaction summary: Any remaining funds from this transaction are available"

Have you ever had this happen?  Why would eBay just give the buyer their money back?  It doesn’t seem like the right thing to do.


Dear SD:

I am not sure why eBay give a buyer’s money back to them when they do not follow the rules.  I have had similar things happen to me, and it seems about fifty percent of the time eBay will refund the buyer without them returning the item. Slowly, eBay is teaching me that there is not much reasoning to their madness.


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